Hi. Thanks for reading this... Still. We're in our third week of blogging, and we're so appreciative that you're still visiting our blog. Every time we see our hit counter increasing a little bit more, that makes us smile. And when it takes a big jump, we jump too. That means you love us very much. We hope you love our new blog layout too, because we fully revamped it - just for you guys ;)
I know all of you are confused about the blog title. If you want to know more, just keep on reading!
Today I'm going to start by talking about...
We decided to blog about this because we know how many of you girls out there, are experiencing this. Experiencing social norms of beauty. The struggle to conform - Or to not conform to it. The struggle of accepting your own body. And the struggle of accepting not just your body, but yourself, and your life in general.
Before we start, let's take a look at what Google has to say about eating disorders:
I guess all of us having this impression that an eating disorder means being severely underweight, starvation, or when someone is officially being "diagnosed" with it, by a doctor. However, to me, that's not the whole truth about it.
Like the definition as shared above - Having an eating disorder means that you have psychological issues regarding how you look at your body, and it defeats your self-esteem. And it disturbs you. All the time.
Throughout my teenage years, there was never one point of time where I did not meet a girl who had issues with her body. I can say, more than 70% of my friends were ever somehow dissatisfied with bodies. Even when their BMI was in the healthy range.
They were never "diagnosed" with eating disorders by a doctor.
But they pick on their food. They leave a quarter of their lunch untouched. They skip breakfasts, they eat a meal a day, or they have waffles for lunch (and to them, that is already a meal). They say things like, "I'm so fat I'm going on a diet this week", or they say "Nah I'm not hungry I'm gonna skip lunch.". And they try to barely squeeze some tummy fat to show me how much they needed to go on a diet.
All these, to me - Already counts as an eating disorder. Because you're not eating lesser or exercising healthier or fitter, but purely because you always feel that you need to lose more weight, to look better. And you'll never feel that you're good-looking enough, or skinny enough.
And I was one of them.
Sorry for the lack of photos, because during that period of time I didn't really feel like, you know, taking photos.
If you think I still look fat in these photos, then I have nothing to say. But as you can see - I was already at a healthy BMI range during that period of time but I couldn't see it.
All I could feel was being disgusted with my body, and that tummy that came up after every time I ate (which is, normal, by all means). All my friends saw me not eating at lunch, and of course they gasped when I only ate chips for lunch (and actually, I meant it to last me for the whole day but they didn't know that), or an apple. And I would say I was "on a diet".
Which was partially true.
The other truth to it was that - I wasn't on a diet. I was starving. I planned to starve. And I was always trying to reach a goal, an ideal weight.
However, as we all know and as doctors say - Consistency is key. Fad diets will never work, and crash diets will as literal as it sounds - crash on you. I stopped starving because my stomach was hurting so bad from gastritis that I would cry and couldn't get up :(
Although putting in my mouth was tough because there was the immense fear of gaining weight, I had to eat because the physical pain was killing me. In a year, I gained back more than all the weight I lost. And in return, I got bad gastric problems that lasted for about 3-4 years. Then I had to work extra hard to get my metabolism rate to return to normal, because during that period of time I was gaining weight even without eating.
And of course - I regretted.
It was at this point of time when I realised that although external beauty is important, internal beauty is what that makes us who we are.
I had reached a goal - Of being 48kg light, but I could never feel confident enough of myself. That led to a lot of missed opportunities, such as meeting new people, trying out new things and more. Because being a perfectionist that I was, I had restrictions and standards for myself. Unless I attain a certain goal, I cannot do what I want to do. In this case, it was eating. For example: Unless I reached 48kg, I cannot have potato chips.
I observed that being such a perfectionist became a problem, in all aspects of my life. For example, I cannot exercise or rest unless I finish my homework. That led to a lot of unhappiness, anger within me. And of course, I started to have an even lower self-esteem, because my character was one of unkindness, grumpiness and unhappiness.
I wonder how many of you are like me. I'm sure, not just a handful. And I would like to share how I managed to snap out of it, and live the life I'm living right now.
It's simple:
I decided that instead of focusing on being perfect, but at the same feeling so negative - why not transfer my energies to positive things instead?
Such as #1 Eating healthy...
And #2 splurging sometimes...
Or #3 Exercising...
Friendly Match. Touch Rugby. Year 1.
After a night run.
Of course, not fogetting to:
#4 Surround yourself with your loved ones...
A twin haircut :)
Spending quality time with my dad.
BBQ/STEAMBOAT!
Best Friend.
Funny faces.
Granny.
Supper time!
Year 1 classmates.
A birthday surprise ;)
Papi.
And during your free time, why don't you -
#5 Do something you love?
Like baking.
And get something like this for your end-product.
Or make a not-very-successful strawberry hearts cheesecake.
Playing an instrument.
Fixing a simple dinner for yourself.
You could also -
#6 Spend some time with Nature...
Enjoying the sea breeze, evening.
Collecting seashells :)
These are just what you can do to stay positive and happy. But what about doing things to impact our society at large? :)
Or #7 Do some community work?
Helping out at an elderly home in Hong Kong.
Performing a song for the elderly.
Planning an internal school exhibition to raise awareness for an elderly home.
So there you have it-- 7 ways to stay positive and happy, AND spread joy to people around you!!!
In brevity - we should never put all our eggs in one basket (Like how I wanted to only lose weight, and neglected my health and studies -> I felt restless all the time) in hope to perfect something.
Aiming for a high standard is good, but being extreme is bad.
Being extreme is bad, under any circumstances. We should always try and aim to be well-balanced, because only that can keep us running the marathon of life for a long time :)
In our previous posts, we talked about both internal and external beauty. I hope you've enjoyed them, and found them helpful :) We left this post to the end because we wanted to use this topic on Eating Disorders to further emphasize the importance of overall wellness, instead of just focusing on only either internal or external beauty. Thank you again, for reading this post!!! :) I hope all of you girls out there will learn to cherish your bodies and live well!
Because together, we can be a change to ourselves.
And also -- To the society.
x,
Tippers on life.
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